I’m starting to think that I do not, and I suppose it will be one of the greatest tests I face. My partner is convinced that he will do anything for me, simply because “he loves me”, whereas I continue to have boundaries. They’re a bit of a hopeless romantic, honestly, and it seems like they’re trying to recreate a teenage-type love they never had.
I thought I was liked for more than my body, but that seems to be the main attraction here :/ And they almost seem offended when I don’t show the same level of interest in theirs and try to convince me to get on viagra or something (which is completely missing the point).
No. I do, however, believe in unconditional positive regard. Essentially, believing that people are doing the best they can with what they have, and genuinely wanting the best for them.
In interpersonal — and especially romantic relationships — success is largely contingent upon mutual adherence to agreed upon conditions. Anyone promoting unconditional love in romantic relationships is likely promoting abuse.
Love is a two way street.
Regard is a one way street.
That’s a great way of looking at it. I’ve reflected and bit and think I need to make sure their needs are being met.
We probably also need to have a conversation about what love means to both of us because it sounds like they’re in love with the idea of love, which I find very childish at this age.