I completely agree and I have personal experiences to back that up
I feel like men who have not been allowed to explore their sexuality in a safe way become extremely angry, frustrated, and dangerous
That’s why I feel like homophobia is something that should be less reviled, and more looked at as a trauma inflicted on the homophobe
This comes from somebody who works in social services, and I myself am non-binary. I know it’s hard to look at the hate that comes from homophobia with compassion, but I feel like it’s necessary in order for society to heal from it
There are secret homosexuals who are homophobes because they have been bullied. Some are openly gay but are self-hating because of bullying as well. To put it succinctly, there are self-hating gays because they have internalised the oppression, and that is manifestation of trauma.
Bottling down the innate sexuality towards the same sex because of societal constraints is bad for the person’s well-being. At worst, it self-perpetuate the culture of homophobia because the self-loathing person adds fuel to the fire.
What can anyone do about it.
Learn to accept that homosexuality is perfectly fine, and those with internalised oppression needs therapy.
No, I don’t understand what you’re saying. What would “looking at as a trauma,” look? Would they go to therapy for the trauma inflicted on them for being hateful? I don’t know what you’re saying.
I see where you’re coming from. I had the same thought a couple of times.
I still feel there are tons of miserable closeted people that wouldn’t hurt a fly, though, so I think it’s probably at best an extreme minority.
I can’t shake the strange feeling that love is in fact a resources that is very scarce.
And that with enough love for every human being at all times, a huge majority of humanity’s problems would simply disappear.
There are a certain percent of people who simply can’t love, or be loved, though. Those would need to be treated as persons with special needs, but also, kinda on a watchlist.
Sadly, there’s currently no way for every human to feel the huge amount of love they’d need. Because of social rules, of the natural mammal tendency to exert sexual discrimination, or simply because life can hurt so much and in so many cruel ways.
The closest I would see to a fully loved world in the future would be AI-driven love, so an ultimately hollow, cold, and fake love instead of the flawed, human one.
I’ve learned to give myself the love I needed through meditation practice, in particular the Ideal Parent Protocol in which you imagine idealized parents loving you just the way you needed but never received. Since doing those practices, along with self love and compassion, I am now able to show up in my relationships with much more compassion and love.
Love is actually infinitely abundant and surrounding us always but trauma closes us off from that reality.
I’ve become increasingly preoccupied with the idea that dudes in denial about their sexuality are actually the most dangerous people in the world
I completely agree and I have personal experiences to back that up
I feel like men who have not been allowed to explore their sexuality in a safe way become extremely angry, frustrated, and dangerous
That’s why I feel like homophobia is something that should be less reviled, and more looked at as a trauma inflicted on the homophobe
This comes from somebody who works in social services, and I myself am non-binary. I know it’s hard to look at the hate that comes from homophobia with compassion, but I feel like it’s necessary in order for society to heal from it
Beware the trap of saying straight people can’t be homophobic
eh? What would that look like?
There are secret homosexuals who are homophobes because they have been bullied. Some are openly gay but are self-hating because of bullying as well. To put it succinctly, there are self-hating gays because they have internalised the oppression, and that is manifestation of trauma.
Absolutely, but what is the use of knowing that information? What can anyone do about it.
Bottling down the innate sexuality towards the same sex because of societal constraints is bad for the person’s well-being. At worst, it self-perpetuate the culture of homophobia because the self-loathing person adds fuel to the fire.
Learn to accept that homosexuality is perfectly fine, and those with internalised oppression needs therapy.
Not entirely sure… but I think you have an issue with the premise of my statement first, if you’d like to discuss that?
No, I don’t understand what you’re saying. What would “looking at as a trauma,” look? Would they go to therapy for the trauma inflicted on them for being hateful? I don’t know what you’re saying.
That the trauma inflicted on them drove them to be hateful, not the trauma inflected from being hateful.
The hate as the result (as in, an unhealthy coping mechanism), not the cause.
It seems like a difficult thing to do in practice. You wouldn’t know they had trauma until they started acting out their hate.
That’s the trauma, the oppression of their own sexual freedom which leads to homophobia
But, how would you know to treat it before they acted out their hate? Are you saying we should have compassion after they acted out their homophobia?
Anyone who has to hide a core part of who they are is automatically at a disadvantage from a “basic survival” standpoint.
It pits you against yourself and against the world.
grew up in a cult, can confirm.
I see where you’re coming from. I had the same thought a couple of times.
I still feel there are tons of miserable closeted people that wouldn’t hurt a fly, though, so I think it’s probably at best an extreme minority.
I can’t shake the strange feeling that love is in fact a resources that is very scarce. And that with enough love for every human being at all times, a huge majority of humanity’s problems would simply disappear.
There are a certain percent of people who simply can’t love, or be loved, though. Those would need to be treated as persons with special needs, but also, kinda on a watchlist.
Sadly, there’s currently no way for every human to feel the huge amount of love they’d need. Because of social rules, of the natural mammal tendency to exert sexual discrimination, or simply because life can hurt so much and in so many cruel ways.
The closest I would see to a fully loved world in the future would be AI-driven love, so an ultimately hollow, cold, and fake love instead of the flawed, human one.
I guess love is truly all you need.
i feel a need to remind you:
I’ve learned to give myself the love I needed through meditation practice, in particular the Ideal Parent Protocol in which you imagine idealized parents loving you just the way you needed but never received. Since doing those practices, along with self love and compassion, I am now able to show up in my relationships with much more compassion and love.
Love is actually infinitely abundant and surrounding us always but trauma closes us off from that reality.