The “expert” advice:

It has been proven that drinking liquid lithium improves your sleep quality by 3.62%.

I just can’t feel it though. Indie means small to me, maybe inaccurately so. I look at Terraria, and I see fame and fortune. Fame and fortune to me, are somewhat antithetical to the concept of an indie. I know you think what you want to think, that’s fair, but I don’t get how you see it. I guess you have a different definition of indie? I don’t know. I just find it extremely difficult to see from your perspective, when Terraria is so famous and so well established that it is routinely compared to industry giants like Minecraft and what not.

It’s famous and cemented, and that sort of disqualifies it from indie status from my perspective.

Sort of? Like, your argument makes sense, it totally does. I just don’t feel it, if that makes any sense. I know working off emotions is not a good decision when it comes to things like these, but I just can’t find myself looking at these companies and giving them that moniker.

Like, from my perspective, Supergiant Games has a lot more in common with Activision/Blizzard/Ubisoft than, well, if you want an example, @Comrade_Mushroom@hexbear.net’s game is a much better fit in my opinion. I just can’t get it through my head that comrade has anything in common with Supergiant Games. If comrade was placed into a room with the CEO/whatever of Supergiant Games, would they have more in common than if the CEO/whatver of Supergiant Games was placed into a room with the CEO of Blizzard Entertainment?

Honestly, I know it’s technically accurate to call various games “indie games” but it feels viscerally wrong to describe highly successful and famous game as indies. I don’t think you can convince me (on an emotional level) that the statement “Terraria is an indie game” is not in some way inaccurate, despite it being constantly said.

Like, if you want to make an argument where the only requirements for being an indie game is that you self-publish, you could make the argument that a huge chunk of video games are indies because they are made in house and published in house. But I don’t think ANYONE will ever call GTA V an indie game simply because it was made by Rockstar and published by Rockstar.

I feel like for an indie to actually be an indie in the modern day and age, it actually has to be somewhat small, otherwise you’re just a regular ass video game company. When you sell millions of copies, have dedicated PR managers, a lawyer or two on retainer, how can anyone argue that you are an indie studio?

It’s kinda hard for me to say, tbh.

I don’t really know if a lot of my issues are comorbidities with the heaps of other health issues I have, but I feel like autism has definitely prevented me from doing a lot of things I want to do. For instance, from what I read, there’s been a lot of talk about “autistic burnout” and I think, if it really what I’m suffering from, then it will cause me so many problems (it’s already causing me a lot of problems, but I dread the future.)

I also have a lot of serious mental health issues, and I think a lot of it can be attributed due to the fact that trying to interact with “regular” society has netted me a lot of pain, suffering, and trauma. I also have extreme confidence issues resulting from so much allistic reprimand, where I have a compulsion to believe everything that I say or do is wrong / incorrect, and it’s a living nightmare where I second guess myself all the time and react negatively to criticism.

Overall, my autism has (and probably will) cause me so much trouble and suffering both now and in the future. If I had the chance, would I reject it? Not really, even though I have never beared it’s supposed fruits (people have told me that autism can “help” but I have many doubts) and have only experienced a constant stream of anxiety and pain, but I don’t think it’s inherently negative. Like @SuperZutsuki@hexbear.net and @lilypad@hexbear.net said in this thread, it’s really an impediment brought about by material conditions rather than any hypothetical inherent badness of autism.

I don’t want to vent too much, but yeah, I do consider it to be a disability, and it will probably bar me from many tasks - both necessary (jobs) and recreational (art).

Yes, thank you for reminding me.

Has the ADL ever done anything useful?

The only “experience” I had with the ADL somewhat personally was a milquetoast anti-bullying campaign (that didn’t even work, btw) and that was about it. It just seems like their actions range from “Ineffectual Faux Progressism” to “Liberal Hyper-Zionism” and they do literally nothing else. Fuck 'em straight to hell either way though.

I honestly don’t think I’ll be able to get my main worldbuilding project done, but I made some decent progress. I got an idea for another mini worldbuilding project however, so it’ll be a bit of a brain teaser. Hopefully it’ll be fun and improve my mood a bit. Besides that, nothing really interesting has happened. Here’s to another week, though.

Hopefully, emphasis on hopefully, I’ll be working on my worldbuilding project. I procrastinated on it long enough, but hopefully I can push myself into getting it done this weekend.

It better be some joke that I’m not aware of, but this just seems pretty shit if they really ARE donating the proceeds to his funeral and talking about not “politicizing” it.

Nurgle is most pleased that John Fetterman waters his grand garden.

Let me guess, it’s gonna be a “No! I’m more racist than you!” competition? Are they gonna try to compete on how many slurs they can throw out? Are they gonna try to maximize their HPPM (Hitler Particles Per Minute)?

Fuckin’ Nazis. What is there to legitimately discuss? The fact that they’re horrible people? Not in a trillion years with them.

Probably just a run-of-the-mill fascist spouting their bullshit, nothing special to my knowledge.

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