From my perspective, none of what transpired was polyamorous. It sounds like she just monkey-branched you and she’s always been monogamous, and simply looked for an old flame because of all the stressors that occured (past regression I think it’s called? Some kind of withdrawal to something positive in your past when things become terrible). Either way, she has always cheated on you, and pretending to want to open up the relationship was just further deception, and only was even suggested because she was caught. People like that, give polyamory a bad name.
I think what you should ask yourself too is, are you actually ready for a poly relationship, or even a monogamous one? To me it sounds like you’re living in a toxic environment, where she has used your feelings to keep you as a dad and provider while doing what she wants, and suffering no repercussions from her hurtful actions. Maybe you need to hear this, or maybe you’ve already heard it, but what she’s done to you is wrong, man. Very wrong. I could never do something like that to any of my partners, even if I no longer loved them the same.
I feel like an official divorce and complete separation would be best for you before you seek out a new relationship. Polyamory takes more work and communication than monogamy, and it really doesn’t sound like you’re in the headspace at the moment.
If you haven’t, I think you should see a therapist and talk out your feelings and get down to how your core is, and how to overcome the fear and uncertainty you still have before jumping into any relationship. Otherwise you might just be hurting yourself further in the long run.
That’s just my opinion based on what you’ve posted though, you know you better than I of course.
I imagine if a Chinese company far away can pull all this off for so long without getting caught, the entire close by Russian government could do much, much more.