I was terrified of these when I was little, but fortunately they’re not that common in Yorkshire. I made the decision to focus my worry on the Bermuda Triangle instead.

Why would I eat a guinea pig’s name?

And there’s me just thinking the joke was that it turned him into anime.

Sir Walter Raleigh returns from the New World to present the crazy edible tubers he found to the Queen of England, but Samwise Gamgee is already there with his pot.

You can choose not to drive bleeding edge technology, but sadly you have no choice in whether to share the road with it.

They should call for federal aid.

The bit about alewives is. The hat thing is supposition.

The firm handshake worked great until I met an employer who was higher Dan in Judo than me.

Absolute snorkle.

Kai got it easy!

Your holiday is from the heatwave.

Me too! I’d get a new mechanical keyboard but they start asking if I want red, brown, blue or beige switches and I’m like “I dunno what that is!”. Also they cost a tonne and my Dell came free with a tower PC.

L-shaped Enter key master race.

Is this specifically relating to the difference between Victoria and Mississippi?

Victoria is that low cos they don’t fuck around when it comes to driving fines. The speed limit means limit, and they’re cracking down hard on drivers using phones.

Relatable.

Mine picks at the side of the mattress until I give in and swing my legs out, then she runs off to the food bowl to eat the biscuits that are always there overnight. She doesn’t even need me to do that!

Does being a weird little capitalist lickspittle even work on LinkedIn? I see people obviously trying to game the algorithm to gain exposure, including groups of devs sharing basic tips with each other and commenting to amplify, even though you’d think most hiring managers know that devs absolutely don’t go to LinkedIn to learn and share tips.

“Death tax” energy.

They were more independent until several years back when the Tory Brexit party brought them to heel by installing loyalists at the top, due to their bad habit of reporting the facts about how things were going. Of course even before that they were masters of the false-equivalence-dialectic style where they’ll force an expert in something to debate against a man who lives in a shed who thinks women are genetically identical to crabs - all in the interest of showing both sides of the debate.