I am an apostate, though I do live secretly as one. I live in constant fear, but for specific reasons that are often not seen.

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Joined 4 months ago
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Cake day: March 13th, 2025

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  • Pride month celebrations were my go-to events in secret. My family doesn’t really understand the niche appeal of the game, and state religious agents can’t really “disguise themselves” ingame. But if Jagex is veering right, they might (like twitter) sell my information to security agencies the same way the Sauds/Turks did to Twitter a few years ago.

    At least I get to wear my pride cape 24/7 until my membership runs out. In hindsight, It was a bad idea to assume that shooting stars/maple forestry/w301 hate chats were “isolated incidents”. They’re clearly part of an ongoing trend that has the CEO’s approval. Oh well, there’s always a countdown to good things. I should enjoy it while it lasts.



  • I’m in agreement with this decision. But I don’t share the reasoning and context behind the conclusions regarding free speech. I’m non-europe, so the slogan “from the river to the sea” doesn’t strike me as an impression that calls for Hamas. I suppose german lawmakers often make contextual decisions centered around their own experiences. That explains their legal stance, and I don’t agree with it. I do agree with the decision to avoid the wrath of law enforcement agencies. As I understand it, i think it is reasonable enough since I’ve had members of my community vanishing without a trace until this day.

    Throughout history, governments (WW2 and others) do commit atrocities and human rights violations. I think moderation teams allowing ample space for genocide documentation is good. As I understand it, other social medias such as Instagram don’t allow genocide documentation at all. Granted, I think more should be done about it even in smaller communities like this. But that’s besides the point, and I’m not an internet regular. And where real or digital spaces don’t outright endorse “absolute free speech”, I think spaces that allow specifics in their discourse is a good enough space to live in. After all, It is never ideal to let governments run fascist mode without accountability.





  • Supposing that the mod is using the “german definition”, there is still the issue of hosting an incredibly popular instance. In online places where a huge influx of non-german users live, I’d argue that it should be treated like a public place where free speech is granted. How am i supposed to understand the cultural realities of Germany if I live thousands of miles away from it? Am I supposed to tone down my right to free speech just because they’ve treated their subjective experience as a universal law?

    But I like that on Lemmy, I’m seeing diverse discussion on German/Austrian law. I don’t get to see that on other prominent platforms, which tend to favor wikipedia-type discourse that often ends with american pop history/culture inferences.





  • I see everything as a risk, since I’m living a double life. It is often that the road for me to leave as an apostate is narrow, and chances of me being free is close to none. But I don’t stop there. I remind myself that I have friends who looked after me, and I mourn those who passed away from terminal illnesses. Grief seems to talk to me not in stages, but as a constant companion. I balance everything with the good and the meditative. It doesn’t always work, but I like to try them everyday anyway. Good luck buddy.


  • Cultivating and making a new home in the Internet, away from all the usual noise. I selectively choose my sources, but some apps like Lemmy tend to do them automatically. I say to myself that I don’t have infinite time and will only read reliable world updates. A new home takes time, but I think it’ll pay off in the long run.




  • Unfortunately, as I understand it, Bluesky has an identical algorithm with Twitter. Ive lost patience with how American-led technology has taken the world’s attention for granted. What I had when I was on Bluesky was reading the same information being viraled and repeated, and the same prominent users from Twitter absorbing almost all of my attention. Bluesky promoting the same users since 2010 made the world smaller for me and I’d rather be on Mastodon where smaller creators are somewhat boosted. Moreover, spaces on Lemmy are teaching me a lot about the European Union, and since I’m an outsider and I don’t live in the west, I deeply enjoy being educated rather than sensationalized with the same conspiracy theory. I firmly believe there’s a larger world than what an American-led algorithm often portrays. But, I acknowledge that everyone is different and I understand that they might still have preferences that are different to mine. Nonetheless, I still want an algorithm that actually shows me niche topics all around the world.




  • These hobbies aren’t necessarily a recreational activity. There are those who claim to have sixth sense only for them to make false judgements on top of false beliefs. Hobbies can involve pushing for wrong insights and most definitely include a self-absorbed vanity project. I don’t judge, but I do actively take note of false judgments when they arise.

    Alas, I’m stuck with one but at least she doesn’t know that I’ve apostatized.


  • The opposite of “in hiding”. State religious authorities catching wind of my apostasy, and bringing me before a “religious rehab” judge. Judge delivers his sentence on me, in accordance with his religious rules. My community loses another apostate, and other like-minded individuals secretly turtle-up even further.

    But hey, perks of being an apostate is having fun and leading a content life in the digital universe. So, I’m happy living in new homes that serve as permanent alternative spaces to Meta and others.